I have found my cure for insomnia, or at least a
way to occupy me whilst I can’t sleep… It is returning to my true love. Ok lets
get back on track folks. The top knot…
I can remember the days when a messy bun was just that, a messy
bun. Now the term “The Top Knot” has been coined… I mean with people other than
ballerinas and upidies. Today’s hipsters a many and everyday commoners are
sporting the do everywhere!
I mean I too can be seen wearing it; in fact I do it often
as I find it hides the 2nd day of unwashed hair spiel.
This may have been washed actually, just seriously frizzy
from the Florida humidity. What evs.
But the Top Knot is no-longer a sleek (or messy in some cases like mine) quick hair
trick… There are now many variations. Would you like to see? I’ll show you….
The “Reverse French Braid” Top Knot… now say that five times fast! Not for the faint of heart, or those lacking
upper arm strength… I haven’t conquered this beast yet, in fact the one attempt
I made at it, I ended up falling off my bed and had many bruises. Ouch!
The “Braided” Top Knot… I believe this is
simpler, you just need time and tons o’ bobby pins. And possibly extensions
because if your are like me, blessed with an over abundance of hair that just
wont grow, you may need to consider adding some artificial length. Another pro
to add some extensions, if you do have slightly thinner hair it adds fullness…
You’re welcome.
The “Have Fun Getting that Shit Out of Your Hair” Top Knot…
This I would suggest for someone who has a long weekend of nothingness going
on. Because that is what you need, a long weekend to wash all those sparkles
out. Imagine it being like trying to wash sand out of your hair… Yes I know
because I thought throwing sand in the air would be cool, until in all went in
my hair…. Sorry again for that mom and dad! (Ps I was really young when that
happened… not at all recent!)
The “I Teased the Crap Out of My Hair Last Night
and Now Have No Other Option than a Top Knot” Top Knot…. Hey, remember those
nights when the Snooki bump was all the rage, but then the next morning you had
a Rasta dread forming? Yeah here you go to fix that issue.
The “My Forehead and Top Knot are Best Friends,
Thus they Remain as One” Top Knot… For those of you with a little larger
foreheads, I recognize… but also don’t do these. These top knots are “knot”
your friend. See what I did there? I exchanged not for knot. I bet you were
wondering when I would do that! No? Anyway, these are better for people with a
nonexistent forehead, Teresa Giudice. They help elongate the forehead, and help
you out!
I hope you have all enjoyed this lesson in the top knot, and
I hope you were all paying attention.. Its an important one to learn.
Peace out my “knotty” readers. And remember, no table
tossing…
